'Gangnam Style' Prophesies Death Of Pope Benedict

Pope: Gay Marriage Is A Threat To Humanity

Via Reuters:

Pope Benedict said Monday that gay marriage was one of several threats to the traditional family that undermined "the future of humanity itself."

He told diplomats from nearly 180 countries that the education of children needed proper "settings" and that "pride of place goes to the family, based on the marriage of a man and a woman."

"This is not a simple social convention, but rather the fundamental cell of every society. Consequently, policies which undermine the family threaten human dignity and the future of humanity itself," he said.

So, I suppose this means that the Pope doesn't think gays are human?

And how exactly does gay marriage undermine the family?

Because the child abuse rate is at 0% in lesbian households?

Because same-sex parents raised this kid?

Because 21 studies of children of homosexual parents uniformly found no systematic differences between children reared by a mother and father and those raised by same-sex parents?

Because the American Academy of Pediatrics, the American Academy of Pediatrics, the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, the American Psychiatric Association, the American Psychological Association, the American Psychoanalytic Association, the National Association of Social Workers, the Child Welfare League of America, the North American Council on Adoptable Children, and Canadian Psychological Association have all issued reports and resolutions in support of gay and lesbian parental rights?

Pray tell.

Man Burns Bible, Tosses It Into Crowd, At Pope's Sunday Mass

Yesterday during a two-hour Sunday Mass in St. Peter's Square, Pope Benedict XVI named three new saints for the Catholic Church.

However, it was hard to top the excitement of a disruption caused by a man who climbed out onto the upper colonnade, burned a bible, and yelled, "Pope, where is Christ?" before throwing the burned bible into the crowd below.

The man was talked down by the Pope's posse and whisked away. The Vatican has not disclosed the dungeon location where the man is currently being held.

(I kid. I hope.)