Pastor Gives God's State Of The Union

Pastor,  and prop aficionado, Steven Andrew
Pastor Steven Andrew, who recently blessed us with his overtly-theocratic and grammatically offensive Christian Voters Guide, delivered God's State of the Union address yesterday. (The video of the address can be viewed below.)

So, not only are Americans entitled to a GOP rebuttal, we also get to hear God's.

Or at least God as he speaks through Pastor Andrew (which is, apparently, speaking in a Mister Rogers tone, but with a slight lisp, and surrounded by props).

Andrew begins his address with a prayer:
Heavenly Father, we come before you in Jesus' name, and father we ask, what is your state of the union. What do you want to tell Americans? Father, we look to you. You are our God, and we thank you now for answering us."
Andrew then spends some time telling us that America is a Christian nation, as he is wont to do. You see, in Andrew's view, non-Christians are not Americans. And there's certainly no place for homosexuals here, either.
What kind of God is willing to overlook a lukewarm church? A God who is willing to overlook a nation that has taken God out of government, schools, and courts? A God who is willing to overlook the sins of taking the holy bible and Christian prayer of school. A god who is willing to overlook 53+ million abortions?...But the blood of Jesus Christ is able to cleanse our nation and each individual who has been partaking of those abortions.

There is forgiveness for you and there's forgiveness for America through Jesus Christ. And also a God who's willing to overlook the sexual and homosexual sins that have been in the United States of America. Can you imagine a love so great?

Now I also want to ask you to look at a God who's willing to forgive Americans for foreign gods. God is a jealous God and yet the blood of Jesus says that He will forgive us as we repent from foreign gods.

Did you know that 80% of Americans say are Christians today? We have always been a Christian nation and we always will be a Christian nation. The reason is because we are a covenant Christian nation. You can't break a covenant.

Now, also look at a God willing to forgive all the Christians and Catholics who have voted for ungodly people, like Barack Obama, or for a Mormon cult member like Mitt Romney.

In an interview with The Christian Post, Andrew was asked about his belief that Obama is ungodly. He stated that Obama is a "wolf in sheep's clothing."
"What is Obama's fruit? His fruit is taking God out of government, lying that we're not a Christian nation, leaving living babies alone to die who survive botched abortions, repealing Don't Ask Don't Tell...this is his fruit. So according to our Lord Jesus Christ, Obama's a wolf in sheep's clothing. It doesn't matter what he says."

Andrew believes that Obama was trying to turn George Washington's "Christian law into a non-Christian law," in regards to repealing Don't Ask Don't Tell.

"Ever since the beginning of the USA, homosexual sin has been outlawed in the military and the reason is because we want God to bless us in the military. And now for the first time in America people are trying to change into non-Christian ways," he said.

"Obama is against Christ...he's trying to break our covenant with God. The greatest evil anyone can do is leading a nation away from Jehovah."
Regarding Mitt Romney as "cult member," Andrew's USA Christian Ministries stated the following in a press release:
To help Christians understand the Mormon election issue [Andrew] has written "Five Mormon Cult Errors." The errors are Mormons: 1) deny God, 2) preach another gospel, 3) hide the cross, 4) have occult practice and 5) are anti-Christian.

"Many people know that Mormons teach heresies like Jesus is the spirit brother of Lucifer. But do people know voting for Romney will bring God's judgment (2 Chronicles 19:2)?" he adds. "Voting for Romney or Obama who do not follow God causes the economy to decline and removes Christian freedoms (Deuteronomy 28, Leviticus 26).

"If you love Jesus Christ, you won't vote for Mormon Romney," he adds."
Regarding homosexuality, here are some gems from Pastor Andrew, in his own words:
God created male and female. He shows us that there is a difference between the holy ways of one man and one woman lifelong marriage and the unholy ways of fornication, adultery and homosexual sin. God says that when people commit sexual immorality, they “defile My holy name” and a nation doing so is “defiled.”

God and history show us that God destroys homosexual societies.

Be careful you are not deceived. Some are lying about what our Founding Fathers believed on sexual sin. The truth is answered with this question: Who made the laws making homosexual sin illegal in the USA? Our Founding Fathers, George Washington, John Adams, Thomas Jefferson… made homosexual sin illegal in all thirteen colonies, followed by all fifty states. Why? They obeyed God. They were modest and preferred not to say the word “sodomy” so they called the sin “a crime not fit to be named”. George Washington removed by court martial homosexuals out of the military to have God’s blessing.

You have to decide are you on God’s side and our Founding Fathers’ side or are you on sin’s side. You can’t support both. Which side are you on?
In God's State of the Union, Andrew wraps up with a quick prayer, and a sales pitch to purchase his book.

1 comment:

  1. Eric, please tell me this is a long-lost pilot for a SNL skit. How do you not totally lose it when you find this stuff?
    Oh, I especially love your very first tag for the post. You slay me.