Bryan Fischer: 'Why Not Feature Hitler & John Wayne Gacy During LGBT Month?'

Sorry, Bryan Fischer, but you've already earned your Asshole merit badge. We can't keep handing these things out.

American Family Association spokesman and gigantic asshole, Bryan Fischer, just keeps raising the bar, folks. Yesterday on his radio show, Bryan discussed his favorite bogeyman: Teh Gays. More specifically, Mr. Fischer was discussing LGBT History Month. Boy, did he get his panties in a bunch.

While LGBT History Month is nearly over, Fischer addressed it in relation to the Viki Knox controversy. You can hear his comments here.

This whole thing is about Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Transgender History Month. So my question again, if this is about homosexual history month, are they going to feature all the homosexuals that had an enormous impact on history?

Are they going to feature John Wayne Gacy? He's the homosexual pedophile, remember, that killed thirty-three young boys and young teenagers and buried them under the crawlspace in his house. He was a homosexual. Is he going to be a part of their display?

Adolf Hitler had a record as a homosexual prostitute in the streets of Vienna in the 1910s. He was denied promotions in the German military in World War I because of his homosexual behavior. He formed the Nazi Party in a homosexual bar, a gay bar, in Munich. All of his enforcers, almost every one of the Brownshirts; all the officers and almost all the Brownshirts were homosexuals. Is that going to be a part of Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Transgender Month? We will wait to see.

Not only are Fischer's comments hateful, offensive, and inaccurate, but his logic is completely stupid.

Bryan Fischer, asshole

I suppose, by his logic, Fischer would suggest we celebrate Susan Smith and Andrea Yates on Mother's Day.

Do you suggest we canonize Aileen Wuornos during Women's History Month, Bryan? Do we pay tribute to Richard Ramirez and the Menendez Brothers during National Hispanic Heritage Month? Do we honor the Dahmers during Military Family Week?

We can play this game all day long. I know you love to vilify an entire group of people by propping up one bad example. You also think that by pointing out that some bad people accepted evolution, that evolution should be rejected. Guess what, Brian? Evolution is still a naturally occurring phenomenon whether bad people accept it or not. LGBT people still exist even if one of them happens to do something wrong.  Guess how many serial killers and dictators were heterosexual, Bryan? A whole lot of them.

I keep thinking that, sooner or later, even the American Family Association (which despite its benign and virtuous-sounding name is a bona fide hate group) will think that he's gone too far.

And you'd think that American politicians would have the dignity to refuse to be associated with such a hateful little bile-spewing butthole, but they're practically waiting in line to hang out with him (or share the stage with him).

Don't hold your breath. Actually, in this case you might want to.

What Are They Smoking At Herman Cain Campaign HQ? Redux

Last month we asked, "What Are They Smoking At Herman Cain Campaign HQ?"

This month, while Cain is certainly enjoying more success in the polls than he was last month, we're still asking the same question.

This time around, however, there's no hiding the smoking part.

The Relative Insignificance Of Your Problems (And Perhaps, Humanity)

If there's anything that's difficult for humans to grasp, it's the relative insignificance of humans.

While going about our days, it's easy for the little things to set us off.  A bad experience in the DMV line can alter our mood for the entire day. Getting cut off in traffic can raise our blood pressure. Getting rejected by an employer or a romantic interest can seem like the end of the world.

The below image, from the University of Wisconsin's Geoscience department, should help you put things into perspective. When the history of the world, and the evolution of life, is cast into a 24-hour clock, it's difficult to not feel that many of our daily gripes are trivial. In fact, it's difficult to not feel as if humanity itself is kind of trivial.

If the history of the world were cast into a 24-hour clock, humans would not show up until 11:58:43 PM.

Keep in mind that, in addition to the immensity of this timeline, it has been 13.75 ± 0.13 billion years since the Big Bang. (Earth was formed a mere 4.54 billion years ago).

If that's not enough to make those worries melt away, also consider that there are at least 100 billion stars with planets in our galaxy and about 100 billion galaxies in the observable universe. If we widen the scope, we must also consider that scientists have estimated there are at least 10 trillion planetary systems in the known universe, with many planets possibly harboring intelligent life.

Relax.

h/t Sheril Kirshenbaum

Guest Post: One Way I've Changed, Since Becoming A Dad

The below guest post was written by Matt Shipman, a science writer and father of three who lives in Raleigh. You can follow Matt on Twitter at @ShipLives or connect with him here on Google+. This is the first in an ongoing series of 'Allies For Equality' guest posts.

I've always felt that gay rights were important. I have gay friends and family members who I love and respect, so I could hardly feel otherwise. But gay rights have become increasingly important to me since I started a family.

I have three wonderful children. They are the center of my universe, and I never knew it was possible to love anyone or anything as much as I love them. It is awesome, in the true sense of the word -- it inspires awe.

Whenever I see a news item about a child who has taken his or her own life as a result of bullying or ostracization, the first thing I think of is the fact that that was someone's child. I talk to, hold and comfort my children every day. I watch them play with other kids. Many of my closest friends have young kids. It is impossible to tell which of these youngsters will be gay. The idea that someone could want to hurt any of these children because of their sexual orientation triggers my protective instincts. But I can't follow my kids around for the rest of their lives and protect them, much less all of the other kids that call me "Uncle Ship" or "Mister Ship."

So I feel compelled to reject anything -- anything -- that seems to intimate that someone who is gay is somehow less important than someone who is straight. That runs the gamut from slurs to the rights that we all (should) enjoy as citizens. Being a child and a teenager is difficult enough. We don't need to introduce artificial hurdles that contribute, intentionally or not, to hateful behavior.

Michele Bachmann Doesn't Judge Homosexuals -- Except When She Does

After David Gregory played Michele Bachmann recordings of herself stating, among other things, that homosexuality is "part of Satan," "sexual dysfunction," and "personal enslavement," she clarified that she doesn't judge homosexuals.

In fact, states Bachmann, if she were president, she would treat them with "honor and dignity." And by "honor and dignity" she means "as Satanic and dysfunctional slaves."

She also stated that she would have no problem appointing an openly gay judge, as long as they shared her views -- which are that homosexuality is "part of Satan," "sexual dysfunction," and "personal enslavement."

Man Burns Bible, Tosses It Into Crowd, At Pope's Sunday Mass

Yesterday during a two-hour Sunday Mass in St. Peter's Square, Pope Benedict XVI named three new saints for the Catholic Church.

However, it was hard to top the excitement of a disruption caused by a man who climbed out onto the upper colonnade, burned a bible, and yelled, "Pope, where is Christ?" before throwing the burned bible into the crowd below.

The man was talked down by the Pope's posse and whisked away. The Vatican has not disclosed the dungeon location where the man is currently being held.

(I kid. I hope.)

Slicing and Dicing Biblical Data

Openbible.info has done an interesting analysis of the positive and negative sentiment in the Bible, and has created some pretty neat and visually stunning visualizations from their findings.

According to Open Bible, the below visualization "explores the ups and downs of the Bible narrative, using sentiment analysis to quantify when positive and negative events are happening:"

Click for larger image, or grab a full size download here (.png, 4000×4000 pixels).

Things start off well with creation, turn negative with Job and the patriarchs, improve again with Moses, dip with the period of the judges, recover with David, and have a mixed record (especially negative when Samaria is around) during the monarchy. The exilic period isn’t as negative as you might expect, nor the return period as positive. In the New Testament, things start off fine with Jesus, then quickly turn negative as opposition to his message grows. The story of the early church, especially in the epistles, is largely positive.

Responding to commenters on the site, Open Bible created another visualization, this time with the data arranged by book "with a moving average of five verses on either side. (By comparison, the [other] visualization uses a moving average of 150 verses on either side.)"

Click for larger image, or grab a full size download here (.png, 2680×4000 pixels).

While the data, or the visualizations, aren't exactly mind-blowing or surprising to anyone who has a good knowledge of Biblical narratives, it is compelling in that it illustrates the way that modern technology allows us to explore ancient manuscripts in ways that its writers never would have imagined.

And while the above data-slicing may point to the wealth of negative sentiment in the Bible as a means of illustrating the questionable nature of much of its content, it also reminds us that The Bible is at its heart a work of literature. Any literature without its peaks and valleys would not have very much to offer anyone.

I would be interested in seeing some more complex, and telling, data analysis, such as a comparison of harmful vs. non-harmful commands given by God, or a comparison of prohibitive vs. permissive language.

See Open Bible for more information, including methodology.