Michele Bachmann Doesn't Judge Homosexuals -- Except When She Does

After David Gregory played Michele Bachmann recordings of herself stating, among other things, that homosexuality is "part of Satan," "sexual dysfunction," and "personal enslavement," she clarified that she doesn't judge homosexuals.

In fact, states Bachmann, if she were president, she would treat them with "honor and dignity." And by "honor and dignity" she means "as Satanic and dysfunctional slaves."

She also stated that she would have no problem appointing an openly gay judge, as long as they shared her views -- which are that homosexuality is "part of Satan," "sexual dysfunction," and "personal enslavement."

Man Burns Bible, Tosses It Into Crowd, At Pope's Sunday Mass

Yesterday during a two-hour Sunday Mass in St. Peter's Square, Pope Benedict XVI named three new saints for the Catholic Church.

However, it was hard to top the excitement of a disruption caused by a man who climbed out onto the upper colonnade, burned a bible, and yelled, "Pope, where is Christ?" before throwing the burned bible into the crowd below.

The man was talked down by the Pope's posse and whisked away. The Vatican has not disclosed the dungeon location where the man is currently being held.

(I kid. I hope.)

Slicing and Dicing Biblical Data

Openbible.info has done an interesting analysis of the positive and negative sentiment in the Bible, and has created some pretty neat and visually stunning visualizations from their findings.

According to Open Bible, the below visualization "explores the ups and downs of the Bible narrative, using sentiment analysis to quantify when positive and negative events are happening:"

Click for larger image, or grab a full size download here (.png, 4000×4000 pixels).

Things start off well with creation, turn negative with Job and the patriarchs, improve again with Moses, dip with the period of the judges, recover with David, and have a mixed record (especially negative when Samaria is around) during the monarchy. The exilic period isn’t as negative as you might expect, nor the return period as positive. In the New Testament, things start off fine with Jesus, then quickly turn negative as opposition to his message grows. The story of the early church, especially in the epistles, is largely positive.

Responding to commenters on the site, Open Bible created another visualization, this time with the data arranged by book "with a moving average of five verses on either side. (By comparison, the [other] visualization uses a moving average of 150 verses on either side.)"

Click for larger image, or grab a full size download here (.png, 2680×4000 pixels).

While the data, or the visualizations, aren't exactly mind-blowing or surprising to anyone who has a good knowledge of Biblical narratives, it is compelling in that it illustrates the way that modern technology allows us to explore ancient manuscripts in ways that its writers never would have imagined.

And while the above data-slicing may point to the wealth of negative sentiment in the Bible as a means of illustrating the questionable nature of much of its content, it also reminds us that The Bible is at its heart a work of literature. Any literature without its peaks and valleys would not have very much to offer anyone.

I would be interested in seeing some more complex, and telling, data analysis, such as a comparison of harmful vs. non-harmful commands given by God, or a comparison of prohibitive vs. permissive language.

See Open Bible for more information, including methodology.

20 Christian Academics Speaking About God

Via Open Cutlture:

This summer, Jonathan Pararajasingham created 50 Renowned Academics Speaking About God and then Another 50 Renowned Academics Speaking About God. If you’re counting, that makes 100. Right alongside these twin videos came 20 Christian Academics Speaking About God, a montage featuring some respected figures (save Dinesh D’Souza) trying to square religious beliefs with their scientific work.

Featured, in order of appearance:

1. Professor George Coyne, Astronomer, Vatican Observatory
2. Robin Collins, Professor of Philosophy
3. Dr Benjamin Carson, Paediatric Neurosurgeon
4. John Lennox, Oxford Professor of Mathematics
5. Francis Collins, National Human Genome Research Institute Director
6. John Polkinghorne, Cambridge Professor of Mathematical Physics
7. JP Moreland, Professor of Philosophy, Biola University
8. William Dembski, Research Professor of Philosophy
9. Dr Rowan Williams, Archbishop of Canterbury
10. Dinesh D’Souza, Hoover Research Fellow, Stanford
11. Dr Ravi Zacharias, Renowned Christian Apologist
12. Brian Leftow, Oxford Professor of the Philosophy of the Christian Religion
13. Dr William Lane Craig, Renowned Apologist and Philosopher
14. Nicholas Saunders, Science and Religion Scholar, Cambridge
15. NT Wright, Leading New Testament Scholar
16. Alvin Plantinga, Notre Dame Professor of Philosophy
17. Alistair McGrath, Oxford Professor of Historical Theology
18. Freeman Dyson, Physicist, Institute for Advanced Study, Princeton
19. RJ Berry, Professor of Genetics, UCL
20. Denys Turner, Yale Professor of Historical Theology

God: 'It Getteth Better'

As you may have heard, God will be releasing his first tome in 1,400 years on November 1, with help from David Javerbaum, the 11-time Emmy Award-winning former head writer and executive producer of The Daily Show and the coauthor of America: The Book and Earth: The Book.

As a teaser for The Last Testament: A Memoir, God has released his "It Getteth Better" video.

Pray The Gay Away With High School Pastor Bobby Blakey

Andy Towle, at Towleroad, nailed it:

These two kids should be dating. Instead they're in a horrifying 'pray away the gay' video.

The video below, from White Throne Films, features Bobby Blakey, "a High School Pastor with a passion to help young people follow Christ with a love for God and his word," and two teens who, through the loving grace of God and the guidance of pastor Bobby Blakey, have turned away from their sinful homosexual pasts.

Bobby is on a mission to take on the "one issue that defines this generation: homosexuality."

Bobby states (over a horror-movie score):

"If you don't accept homosexuality, you're not in with what's happening today....In high school classrooms homosexuality is being aggressively promoted. Fringe groups of Christianity are making us look bad by just bashing these people, going after them in a way that is not with gentleness and respect...Why can't we love the homosexual, and tell them the truth about their sin?"

Let's hope Bobby got the memo last week from John Smid, former Executive Director of Love in Action, one of the largest and oldest ex-gay ministries in existence (founded in 1973), who acknowledged his own homosexuality and confirmed that sexual orientation cannot be changed.

More at Towleroad.

Pastor Mark Driscoll: Masturbation Is A Form Of Homosexuality

Mark Driscoll believes that masturbation is a form of homosexuality.

For those unfamiliar with Driscoll, he is not some fringe Fred Phelps-style of lunatic. Preaching Magazine named him one of the “25 Most Influential Pastors of the Past 25 Years.” He's 'hip' and 'youthful' and 'innovative.'

Driscoll is the founding pastor of Seattle-based Mars Hill Church, which was recently rated as the eighth most influential church in the United States, with approximately 7,500 attending services each week, and approximately 100,000 podcast downloads of each service.

What exactly did Driscoll say about masturbation? In his booklet Porn-Again Christian: A Frank Discussion on Pornography & Masturbation for God's Men, Driscoll writes:

Masturbation can be a form of homosexuality because it is a sexual act that does not involve a woman. If a man were to masturbate while engaged in other forms of sexual intimacy with his wife then he would not be doing so in a homosexual way. However, any man who does so without his wife in the room is bordering on homosexuality activity, particularly if he's watching himself in a mirror and being turned on by his own male body.

The booklet contains many other gems, such as:

Masturbation can establish a pattern of laziness. If a single man wants to have an orgasm, he needs to first become a man and undergo the hard work of courting and marrying a woman. If a married man wants to have an orgasm, he needs to first undergo the hard work of loving, leading, and romancing his wife. But, lazy men are prone to rub one out in the shower each morning rather than undergo the labors usually associated with responsible masculine married life.

Enjoy.