6.06.2011

That's Not In The Bible: Phantom Passages and Biblical Illiteracy

CNN's Belief Blog has an interesting look at sayings, proverbs, and quotes that people often inaccurately attribute to scripture.


A handful of examples:

"God works in mysterious ways."

"Cleanliness is next to Godliness."

"This, too, shall pass."

"Spare the rod, spoil the child."

“God helps those that help themselves.”

None of these phrases appear anywhere in the bible. 

There are many things that play into the emergence of such "phantom passages." The number one culprit is ignorance. Most who profess to love and live by The Bible have not actually read very much of it. Confusion is another factor. Sometimes the phantom passage is a distillation of a concept found in scripture (i.e. "Spare the rod" is likely a loose distillation of Proverbs 13:24: "The one who withholds [or spares] the rod is one who hates his son."

I have added some more quotations that are often inaccurately attributed to The Bible:

"Money is the root of all evil."

"Moderation in all things."

"God works in mysterious ways."

"God will not give us more than we can bear."

The Serenity Prayer: "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference."

Aside from mis-attributed quotations, there are also numerous stories from the Bible that have become distorted over the years as people have passed them along in Bible classes, sermons, or in the living room. CNN points out the following examples:

The scripture never says a whale swallowed Jonah, the Old Testament prophet, nor did any New Testament passages say that three wise men visited baby Jesus, scholars say.

Those details may seem minor, but scholars say one popular phantom Bible story stands above the rest: The Genesis story about the fall of humanity.

Most people know the popular version - Satan in the guise of a serpent tempts Eve to pick the forbidden apple from the Tree of Life. It’s been downhill ever since.

But the story in the book of Genesis never places Satan in the Garden of Eden.

“Genesis mentions nothing but a serpent,” says Kevin Dunn, chair of the department of religion at Tufts University in Massachusetts.

“Not only does the text not mention Satan, the very idea of Satan as a devilish tempter postdates the composition of the Garden of Eden story by at least 500 years,” Dunn says.
To most, this is not a big deal. In most cases, the gist of the story is intact -- and let's not fool ourselves, these are simply stories. But what this does illuminate is the fact that most religious people do not really know this book which serves as a foundation for their lives.  And, as the CNN article notes, we tend to infuse the Bible with our own values and morals, rather than the other way around.

Take, for instance, the case of the phantom passage, "God helps those that help themselves." As mentioned above, this can be found nowhere in the Bible. It is so often cited as a validation of self-reliance, or to justify our voracious appetites for capitalism and consumerism. It evokes a reluctance to provide for others. No, this is not a biblical quotation.  It can, however, be attributed to Ben Franklin. 

Sidnie White Crawford, a religious studies scholar at the University of Nebraska, states:

Yet that passage contradicts the biblical definition of goodness: defining one’s worth by what one does for others, like the poor and the outcast, Crawford says.

Crawford cites a scripture from Leviticus that tells people that when they harvest the land, they should leave some “for the poor and the alien” (Leviticus 19:9-10), and another passage from Deuteronomy that declares that people should not be “tight-fisted toward your needy neighbor.”

These examples point to a big problem in America, where, despite the Establishment Clause, scripture finds its way into the political sphere, informing everything from war to healthcare to presidential elections.  It's dangerous enough that we must tolerate religious ideology in public affairs, without having to worry about faux religious ideology.

From the March 22, 2007 cover story in TIME Magazine, The Case for Teaching The Bible:

Nearly two-thirds of Americans believe the Bible holds the answers to "all or most of life's basic questions," but pollster George Gallup has dubbed us "a nation of biblical illiterates." Only half of U.S. adults know the title of even one Gospel. Most can't name the Bible's first book. The trend extends even to Evangelicals, only 44% of whose teens could identify a particular quote as coming from the Sermon on the Mount.
I know that many secular folks would argue that a diminishing understanding of an ancient religious text is not such a bad thing. Surely, they may think, every dead religion once had a period where people began to lose interest in, and knowledge about, their religious stories -- this is just one more instance of that.

Biblical illiteracy is a problem. Not because we need to be more religious as a society, but because the Bible is the most influential book (or, more accurately, collection of writings) on the face of the earth.  It informs countless literary works.  It reverberates throughout history and politics. One cannot study Lincoln, Martin Luther King Jr., or even George W. Bush without encountering allusions to biblical writings. Many of us would not last very long in a sales job if we only knew the name of one or two products in the company's inventory.  A chemist would be laughed out of the lab if he could only recall a handful of elements (and several faux-elements that were nowhere on the periodic table). Can you imagine receiving a lifeguard certificate only knowing the first step of CPR?  Why is it that we can ascribe to a belief system of which we apparently know so little about?  Not that everyone needs to have exhaustive knowledge of their belief system -- we can never know enough. But the figures from the TIME Magazine story illustrate a level of illiteracy that would be unacceptable in most areas of our lives.

Although much good is inspired by scripture, The Bible is used on a daily basis to justify violence, oppression, and discrimination (of course other religious texts do as well).  Most often, these justifications, like the phantom passage examples above, are distorted, erroneous distillations of passages devoid of context. They are often cherry-picked from larger passages which, if the context were understood, might encompass an altogether different sentiment or meaning. Too often, passages which are used to justify violence, hatred, or oppression, are adjacent to other passages that are ignored for their lack of relevance in modern society (but somehow, the cherry-picked passage is perfectly applicable).

Polls suggest that that over 60% of Americans favor secular teaching about the Bible.  Obviously, teaching the Bible, from a literary, historical-critical perspective would be a tough sell in America. Many evangelicals would have issues with this type of warts-and-all presentation that did not include a sales pitch, and many liberals (and those of other faiths) would have issues, since it would be difficult to ensure that teachers were teaching instead of preaching. Other faiths might wish that their holy books get equal time (maybe not such a bad idea, either).  And certainly some vocal atheists would object from the get-go on the grounds that religion is not appropriate for public schools, period, no matter how it is presented. 

If anything, our society needs to have a better understanding of the writings which have so greatly influenced our society. We should be familiar with the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, the great speeches from American history (Gettysburg Address, MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech, Daniel Webster's Plymouth Oration, etc.), and the American literature which has contributed to our culture, and which reflects our past ("Huckleberry Finn," "The Great Gatsby," "The Scarlett Letter," "Invisible Man," etc.). Why is the Bible any less important for Americans to be familiar with?

One benefit that would come from a more biblically literate America would be a decline in scriptural literalism. As we saw above, from the examples of phantom passages, and from the surveys showing our lack of knowledge of what is actually in The Bible, the majority of Americans possess a blind allegiance to something that they truly do not understand.  This is not only embarrassing, it is dangerous.  Biblical literalism leads to a variety of societal ills, including the denial of science, the denial of human rights, sickness, and death. It leads to the rejection of logic.

If Americans really knew The Bible as well as they proclaim, they would understand that it is a cobbled-together collection of writings by many different people (often writing under the guise of someone else), written over many years, in many different languages, for many different audiences, for many different reasons, in very different times.  It has been translated, and re-translated, edited, and assembled, by a variety of people, with certain books rejected and certain books admitted, for a variety of reasons.  It should be read and understood as such.

If we, in our time, have erroneously associated this many quotations and passages to The Bible, we can only begin to imagine the misconceptions and embellishments contained within its very pages.

Rick Perry's 'Response: A Call to Prayer For a Nation in Crisis'

From the Church Meets State files:

Texas Governor and potential GOP presidential candidate Rick Perry wants you to join him in Houston on August 6.  He wants you to "take your place in Reliant Stadium with praying people asking God’s forgiveness, wisdom and provision for our state and nation. There is hope for America. It lies in heaven, and we will find it on our knees."

From the Response Website:

Fellow Americans,

Right now, America is in crisis: we have been besieged by financial debt, terrorism, and a multitude of natural disasters. As a nation, we must come together and call upon Jesus to guide us through unprecedented struggles, and thank Him for the blessings of freedom we so richly enjoy.

Some problems are beyond our power to solve, and according to the Book of Joel, Chapter 2, this historic hour demands a historic response. Therefore, on August 6, thousands will gather to pray for a historic breakthrough for our country and a renewed sense of moral purpose.

It's certainly interesting that a Governor of a state which includes citizens of all faiths (and non-believers) would hold an event which so clearly favors one particular brand of religion. What exactly is going on here, Rick?

From the Response FAQ:

What Does The Response Believe?

We believe the Bible to be the inspired, the only infallible, authoritative Word of God.

We believe that there is one God, eternally existent in three persons: Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

We believe in the deity of our Lord Jesus Christ, in His virgin birth, in His sinless life, in His miracles, in His vicarious and atoning death through His shed blood, in His bodily resurrection, in His ascension to the right hand of the Father, and in His personal return in power and glory.

We believe that for the salvation of lost and sinful people, regeneration by the Holy Spirit is absolutely essential.

We believe in the present ministry of the Holy Spirit by whose indwelling the Christian is enabled to live a godly life.

We believe in the resurrection of both the saved and the lost; they that are saved unto the resurrection of life and they that are lost unto the resurrection of damnation.

We believe in the spiritual unity of believers in our Lord Jesus Christ.


Why is The Response happening? Why should I come?
We believe that America is in a state of crisis. Not just politically, financially or morally, but because we are a nation that has not honored God in our successes or humbly called on Him in our struggles. According to the Bible, the answer to a nation in such crisis is to gather in humility and repentance and ask God to intervene. The Response will be a historic gathering of people from across the nation to pray and fast for America.

Who else will be there?
Governor Rick Perry has invited all US governors as well as many other national Christian and political leaders. People of all ages, races, backgrounds and Christian denominations will be in attendance to proclaim Jesus as Savior and pray for America.

A few questions they left off of the FAQ:

Has Rick Perry ever read the Establishment Clause of the Constitution? 

This event is sponsored by a hate group. You guys know that, right?

Are you out of your fucking mind?



The Response Promo from The Response USA on Vimeo.

Jesus vs. Thor

Via 9gag.com:

6.03.2011

Hi, My Name is Sarah Palin, and I'm an Idiot

And some of you people wanted her to run the country.



UPDATE (10:21pm EST):
According to the blog Legal Insurrection, Sarah may have either gotten lucky, or may actually have known more than we gave her credit for. My money is on the former.

UPDATE 2 (6.6.11):
Sarah doubles down.

RIP Jack Kevorkian

A recent Gallup poll showed Americans to be almost evenly divided on the issue of doctor-assisted suicide, with 48 percent saying it is wrong, and 45 percent saying it is morally acceptable.

This finding, as part of a larger poll on American moral issues, had already started to reignite the debate just days before Jack Kevorkian, the man who ignited the debate in the 1990s, died of kidney related problems.

There are only a few spots in the world where doctor-assisted suicide is permitted: Belgium, Netherlands, Luxembourg and the states of Oregon, Washington and Montana.

Why is doctor-assisted suicide such a lightning rod?

Chege Mbitiru writes in the Daily Nation:
Laws governing suicide and prevailing thinking about it, especially in countries whose legal systems have roots in Greek, Roman and Judeo-Christian legal and intellectual traditions, have two threads in common.

They stigmatise the suicidal as unworthy and totally disregard personal autonomy. To Aristotle, committing suicide was immoral and robbed the state of one’s civic and economic contributions, therefore, an offence.

Modern laws, especially since the Industrial Revolution, have roots here. Society has a claim to an individual until death.

Plato argued people are property of the gods. Stick around until the gods decide otherwise. Christianity fits in this category, sacredness of all life, including vegetative one plus sinfulness of committing or attempting to commit suicide.
Here in the US, the issue is closely tied to Christian values and the pro-life movement. Although opinions vary somewhat from faith to faith, the general agreement among faiths which appose doctor-assisted suicide is that it violates the sanctity of life and interferes with the will of God.

Human beings are the only species who are aware of their own mortality. This causes us much anguish. It affects nearly every aspect of our lives. We work so that we can buy and do things that either promise longevity or distract us from thinking about our mortality. We seek youth and vitality and are at our most gullible when we are promised a means of cheating death.

All of this is very surprising when we look at life and death as bookends -- a set that can never be sold individually. We obsess over birth. We attend classes to prepare us. We have multiple meetings with doctors to ensure that the process is satisfactory. We shower the infant with gifts before it arrives.  We celebrate its entrance with cigars, yard signs, and glossy photo announcements. There are superstores devoted to the beginning of life. There are entire sections of bookstores devoted to preparing for birth, and guides about those first months of life. There are drugs that we can take to ensure that birth occurs with ease, with as little pain as is possible.  We expect to be treated with dignity and respect as we usher in a new life.

Yet, that other lonely bookend, dying, is comparably neglected. There are no classes, no parties, no superstores, no sections in bookstores, no detailed guidebooks. Granted, some of these would be silly, but the point is quite clear: we do not prepare for death. We neglect to learn about what it will be like, or to discuss it with our doctors in advance, as we certainly would a birth. We neglect to ensure that the process of dying is satisfactory. If we didn't already find death horrifying, we would find all of this to be almost comical. We are so in denial that it's kind of hilarious.

Death does not have to be horrible. Sure, not many wish for their life to end, or for their loved ones to cease to live. But we all die. All of us. Why not talk openly about it? Why not learn about what we can expect during the process of dying? Why not have the option to exit this life before we have lost control of our own bodies, before we are locked into an indeterminable period of suffering, before we can no longer retain our dignity or our ability to decide what is best for us.

I guess it's somewhat understandable in our society that many saw Dr. Kevorkian as some kind of a monster -- a grim reaper figure who delighted in taking the life of others.  On the surface it seems totally in line with our horror novels, and our television crime dramas.  While we fear our own deaths, and the deaths of our loved ones, we have a tabloid fascination with the deaths of those outside of our own circle. We have voracious appetites for the details surrounding the deaths of celebrities, pretty teenagers, and toddlers (paging Nancy Grace).  So, it's no mystery why the media ran with the moniker "Dr. Death" when Kevorkian's story gained traction.  What this obscures, however, is the fact that Dr. Kevorkian was first and foremost a physician. He was a humanitarian who advocated for end-of-life awareness, counseling, and choice.  We fail to recall that he rejected 97% of the assisted suicide requests that he received, and assisted only those who were terminal or in extreme suffering.  There are many who would call Jack Kevorkian a hero.

Dr. Kevorkian did not like being called a hero.  At the 1994 American Humanist Association annual conference, he stated:
“I am not a hero...by my definition anyway.  To me, anyone who does what should be done is not a hero. Heroes to me are very, very rare. And I still feel that I’m only doing what I, as a physician, should do… That doesn’t mean I’m more compassionate than anyone else, but there is one thing I am that many are not, and that’s honest.”
Jack Kevorkian was an activist who risked everything he had to stand up for a patient's right to die with dignity.  He helped to transform a notion into a movement, and into a debate about individual rights.

Sir Terry Pratchett, the award-winning, best-selling British author, was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease in 2007.  Knowing full well that he will at some point reach a point where he will no longer be in control of his own thoughts and actions, Pratchett made an emotional plea for the right to end his own life. It is a wonderful piece of writing, and because it is from the point of view of a patient, it further illuminates the compassion and empathy that has so often been overlooked in profiles of Dr. Kevorkian. And because Pratchett's essay is such a wonderful piece of writing, I have included several snippets:
We are being stupid. We have been so successful in the past century at the art of living longer and staying alive that we have forgotten how to die. Too often we learn the hard way. As soon as the baby boomers pass pensionable age, their lesson will be harsher still...I live in hope - hope that before the disease in my brain finally wipes it clean, I can jump before I am pushed and drag my evil Nemesis to its doom, like Sherlock Holmes and Moriarty locked in combat as they go over the waterfall.

In any case, such thinking bestows a wonderful feeling of power; the enemy might win but it won't triumph.

* * * * *
I hate the term 'assisted suicide'. I have witnessed the aftermath of two suicides, and as a journalist I attended far too many coroners' inquests, where I was amazed and appalled at the many ways that desperate people find to end their lives.

Suicide is fear, shame, despair and grief. It is madness.

Those brave souls lately seeking death abroad [Ed: in places where doctor-assisted suicide is legal] seem to me, on the other hand, to be gifted with a furious sanity. They have seen their future, and they don't want to be part of it.

* * * * *
I am enjoying my life to the full, and hope to continue for quite some time. But I also intend, before the endgame looms, to die sitting in a chair in my own garden with a glass of brandy in my hand and Thomas Tallis on the iPod - the latter because Thomas's music could lift even an atheist a little bit closer to Heaven - and perhaps a second brandy if there is time. Oh, and since this is England I had better add: 'If wet, in the library.'

Who could say that is bad? Where is the evil here?
* * * * *

The bravest person I've ever met was a young boy going through massive amounts of treatment for a very rare, complex and unpleasant disease. I last saw him at a Discworld convention, where he chose to take part in a game as an assassin. He died not long afterwards, and I wish I had his fortitude and sense of style.

I would like to think my refusal to go into care towards the end of my life might free up the resources for people such as him.

* * * * *

I have met Alzheimer's sufferers who are hoping that another illness takes them away first. Little old ladies confide in me, saying: 'I've been saving up my pills for the end, dear.'

What they are doing, in fact, is buying themselves a feeling of control. I have met retired nurses who have made their own provisions for the future with rather more knowledgeable deliberation.

From personal experience, I believe the recent poll [Ed: which revealed that more than three-quarters of people in Britain approve of assisted suicide for the terminally ill] reflects the views of the people in this country. They don't dread death; it's what happens beforehand that worries them.

Life is easy and cheap to make. But the things we add to it, such as pride, self-respect and human dignity, are worthy of preservation, too, and these can be lost in a fetish for life at any cost.

I believe that if the burden gets too great, those who wish to should be allowed to be shown the door.

In my case, in the fullness of time, I hope it will be the one to the garden under an English sky. Or, if wet, the library.

Hopefully, with no small thanks to outspoken advocates like Jack Kevorkian, and the patients who have been brave enough to stand up for their right to die with dignity, Terry Pratchett will get his wish.

Terry Pratchett, in the garden, with his brandy.

6.02.2011

Rick Perry: The Economic Crisis is God's Way of Bringing Us Back to Biblical Principles

Texas Governor and possible GOP presidential candidate Rick Perry has not been shy about his alignment with the Religious Right. And not just the 'mainstream' Religious Right hate groups like the Family Research Council. We're talking extreme Christocrats.

We also shouldn't forget last month when Perry issued a "Pray For Rain" proclamation

If his unapologetic mix of church and state weren't enough to scare you, then how about this? He has the words 'Liberty' and 'Freedom' emblazoned on his cowboy boots. Scared yet? Take a look at the following clip of Perry on James Robinson's Life Today television show, in which he states that the current economic crisis is God's way of making America return to biblical principles and free us from our slavery to the government.

We already had a president who made war decisions based on biblical prophecy. And that didn't work out too well.  

6.01.2011

Atheist Converts After Mock Prayer 'Answered' By $1 Million Lottery Win

From The Christian Post:
A self-confessed atheist has become a believer after mocking God by sarcastically praying for his mother to win the lottery. However, his joke prayer was amazingly answered as the next day his mother won $1 million on the New York Lottery Sweet Million game.
According to the report, 28-year-old Sal Bentivegna, who did not believe in God, told his mother to pray to her god to ask "for a million dollars." His mother, Gloria, a Catholic, would not do any such thing.  Since his mother refused to, Sal mockingly 'prayed' the following: “God, I don’t know if you’re real or not, but if you are there, please let my mother win a million dollars.”

Guess what happened. You're right. Sal's mother won a million dollars the next day when she purchased a "Lotto Tree" at a church charity auction. One of the tickets on the tree was a million dollar winner.
He testified, “I can’t shrug off that Jesus had a hand in it.”

“No pun intended, but it was a Godsend,” he said.

Gloria Bentivegna, reflecting on what had happened, is thankful to God for her winnings, but even more thankful for her son’s conversion. She said: “'God performed two miracles, a true miracle.”

By winning New York’s Sweet Million game, Gloria Bentivegna will now receive $50,000 every year for the next 20 years.
The odds of winning the New York Lottery Sweet Million game is 1 in 3.8 million.  Two tickets would take it to 1 in 1.9 million.  I'm not sure how many tickets are on a "lottery tree," but regardless, those are considerable odds.

I am curious to know the odds that a Sweet Million player uttered a plea for divine intervention in the game, mockingly or not.  I would assume that a great many do. I am also curious to know the percentage of praying Sweet Million players who were 'denied' the money.  I would bet a million dollars that all of them, winner excluded, did not have their prayers answered in the form of $1 million.

A few things I do know: 1) Sal Bentivegna was not very good at being an atheist.  2) Pascal deserves a share of the winnings.